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Gentleman's Philosophy Manly Skills

Be Assertive, don’t be the Bad Guy

Afternoon gents, it’s Max from The Young Gentleman’s Guide here! So today’s article is going to be another expansion on one of my 15 Rules to Teach your Sons (I imagine there will more than a few more of these in the future since I feel like I can get a lot more material out of that list). In any case, this article is going to talk about one of the most effective ways to be a good leader. This will more clearly explain the phrase, “be assertive, but don’t be the bad guy.” This was always something I heard from my dad while I was the Senior Patrol Leader with my Boy Scout troop, and it’s something that’s stuck with me to this day. So today, I’m going to elaborate more on what that phrase means and how to properly apply it to any leadership position any of you reading may hold in your life.

To start, it’s important to understand what this statement really means. But in all honesty, it’s pretty simple; it means exactly what it sounds like. As a leader, it’s important to be assertive and enforce the rules, but it’s equally as important to have those under his tutelage respect and look up to him. Any team, class, or anything else with a leader who can do this effectively can get so much more out of their efforts than one whose leader doesn’t have his comrades respect him. It’s essentially a two-way street. If the team respects the leader, the leader will respect his team. This will lead to a better and more effective performance from the team as whole.

Now that we’ve gone over what the statement actually means, let’s move onto what I’m sure most of you came to see: how to actually employ this statement to your own leadership position. Now, there are quite a few different ways this strategy can be utilized, but I believe the simplest and most effective way to do so is exactly the same way I described it in my 15 Rules article. That is, a leader should clearly outline the rules to his teammates and enforce them, but he should make it clear that he, the leader, is not at all above them. A true leader doesn’t view himself as superior or in any way above the rest of the team, he is simply another member of said team. If a leader simply does nothing but give commands and then sits back while the team does all the work, then he is no longer a leader, he is a dictator. As such, those under his command will soon come to resent him, which results in the exact opposite outcome of what I outlined above. So in short, while it is important to outline and enforce the rules, a true leader is not above said rules and in no way elevates himself above the other members of the team.

So there it is! I hope this gave you a bit more clarity on what I was trying to say in my original 15 Rules list. This was something that has stuck with me and helped me out in numerous situations throughout my life, and I think it will be a huge help to those of you reading this. In any case, I hope you enjoyed reading today’s article. Please be sure to share the article, follow the blog, follow The Young Gentleman’s Guide on FacebookTwitter, and Instagram, and support us on Patreon. And on that note, this is Max from The Young Gentleman’s Guide, and I’ll see you next time!

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