Gratitude: A Gentleman’s Greatest Quality

Afternoon gents, it’s Max from The Young Gentleman’s Guide here! First of all, my sincerest apologies for not putting anything out for the past few weeks. I was caught in the darkest pits of finals at San Francisco State, but now that school’s out, I should be back to posting regularly for you wonderful readers! With all of that out of that out of the way, let’s get to today’s topic.

For starters, why is gratitude so important? Well, in short, it just makes us happier. Gratitude leads to satisfaction, and satisfaction leads to happiness. Here’s an example of what I mean.

Two men working a decently-paying office job get their paychecks at the end of the week. After getting their checks, one man says to himself “I earned this, this is a testament to a job well done. Maybe if I work harder, I can make a bit more and maybe get a promotion.” However, the other man says “This is all I made? With the amount I’ve done for this company, I clearly deserve more than this.” What’s the difference between the two? The first man was grateful for what he had earned, which made him satisfied with the work he had done, and that will, in turn, make him happier not just at work, but in the rest of his life if he continues that attitude. The second man obviously felt entitled for more money than he earned, which only angered him, and that’s the biggest reason why gratitude is so important. If you take the time to appreciate what you have and what you earn, you’ll get more satisfaction out of them and therefore will be more happy as a result. Whereas an ungrateful will only demand more and be unsatisfied with what they already have. Unfortunately, with today’s increasingly materialistic attitude and increased feelings of victimhood, people in general are leaning more towards the latter.

It’s impossible to deny, people in general (at least in the U.S.) just have an increased idea that they’re victims, and multiple different activist groups will are trying to convince the mass public that they’re victims of patriarchy, white privilege, or any of that nonsense. And it’s very clear to see where this narrative comes from, and that’s ingratitude. Now I am in no way saying that every single person in any of these activist groups acts this way, it’s just that they are the most vocal minority and the ones who get the most attention. In any case, the people who spew this narrative simply refuse to or just simply can’t see how lucky they actually are, and as a result, they are unsatisfied with everything they’ve already been given (it’s practically become a joke that SJWs will never be satisfied). And I’m just going to stop here, since this is becoming much more political than I was planning it to be. In short, just keep in mind this mantra: gratitude leads to satisfaction, satisfaction leads to happiness. Ingratitude leads to entitlement, entitlement leads to anger.

So there it is. Gratitude, in my eyes, is the greatest key to happiness in anyone’s life. To any of you gents reading, ust take a little bit a time to acknowledge what you have and how lucky you are to have such things. If you do that, then I guarantee you that you will be much happier down the road. In any case, I hope you enjoyed reading today’s article. Please be sure to share it, follow the blog, follow The Young Gentleman’s Guide on Facebook and Instagram, and support us on Patreon. Also, keep an eye out for a collaboration between me and my dear friend Elena, the owner of A Vintage Athenian. She’ll be interviewing me for an article on her blog that I’ll reblog here once it’s up. And on that note, this is Max from The Young Gentleman’s Guide, and I’ll see you next time!

Can a Man and a Woman be Friends?

Afternoon gents, it’s Max from the Young Gentleman’s Guide here! Now we’ve all heard of it and I’m willing to bet more than a handful of you gents reading have been there before, I’m talking about the dreaded “friend zone.” For those of you who don’t know what that is, I think Ryan Reynolds in Just Friends puts it best: “When a girl decides that you’re her friend, you’re no longer a dating option. You become this complete non-sexual entity in her eyes, like her brother, or a lamp.” Essentially, the “friend zone” is a situation where one side wants to be involved romantically, while the other wants to just stay friends, usually with the guy wanting to take things further. While it is more common for this to happen to men, I’m sure it happens among women too, it just isn’t as frequent and/or talked about. In any case, this leads to an interesting question among those who are in that dreaded situation, can a man and a woman just be friends? So that’s what we’re setting out to answer today.

If the message of the movie When Harry Met Sally is to be believed, then no, it’s pretty much impossible for a man and a woman to be just friends. However, I feel like this movie takes a very simplistic look at the relationship between a man and a woman (which is in no way meant to talk ill about the movie, I love it a lot, and highly recommend you check it out). They make seem as if a man and woman will automatically think about each other romantically if they start to connect on a personal level. While this may be true for that certain person you happen to find attractive, you can still connect with that man or woman without thinking about them romantically or sexually. The most important thing here is communication. It obviously shouldn’t be right after meeting each other, but you should both let each other know early on what your intentions are before getting too involved. If you aren’t effective in stating what you want out of the relationship, this can obviously create a huge problem. In order to best explain this, I’ll have to tell you my “friend zone” story.

So when I was seventh grade, I was not very well-liked by about half the girls in the student body. But there was one girl, we’ll call her M, who one of the few girls who actually stood up for me, and she and I quickly formed a friendship. And I’m not joking when I say I actually fell in love her practically at first sight, but at the time, I didn’t know what that actually felt like. Anyways, we continue to bond in friendship into high school, and I even end up taking her to her first high school dance! She also invited me to her 16th birthday party, where there was in fact dancing, and M’s parents actually wanted me to share the first dance with her. It was during that first dance that I finally realized how I felt about her, but I didn’t have the nerve to tell her. So for the next few years, I was just stuck. I constantly was wanting more out of our relationship, but she just wanted to stay friends, and it was horrible. After years of keeping those emotions bottled up, I finally wrote a letter to her that spilled the beans. After finally telling her how I felt, that’s when the reality of the situation hit me. I finally came to the realization that she just didn’t see me in that way, and after talking to her a little bit more about that, I eventually came to accept it. Now M and I are now just friends and still talking every now and then.

So if there’s anything you can take from that, it should be that you should be clear about your intentions when you enter into a friendship with a woman, especially if you want to take things further. Also, something else I haven’t mentioned is that you can connect with a woman without being attracted to them sexually. Maybe you and this woman have things in common, but there may just be that thing that keeps you from being attracted to them in that way. That said, I am in no way the arbiter of what people are attracted to, that’s entirely up to you. Just listen to your gut and make smart decision. Also, in the vain of all of this, I think it’d be smart to answer a similar question, can you be friends with an ex? The short answer is yes you can! As long as your breakup wasn’t toxic and didn’t leave any negative air between the two of you, then by all means, continue to connect and be friends. I was in a relationship with someone for almost a year in high school, but after a while, we just started to drift apart and we decided to end it, but our breakup wasn’t anything toxic and was perfectly amicable. And to this day, we’re still good friends, and she’s in fact now married with a kid on the way!

So what exactly am I saying here? In a nutshell, yes, a man and a woman can just be friends, as long as both the people involved in the friendship are clear with each other about each other’s intentions. There may just be those people who may not be sexually attracted to you, and that’s perfectly fine. Developing connections and friendships is what helps humans survive, and it’s perfectly possible to develop those connections with the opposite sex without being attracted to them sexually. In any case, I hope you enjoyed reading today’s article. Please be sure to share it, follow the blog, follow The Young Gentleman’s Guide on Facebook and Instagram, and support us on Patreon. And on that note, this is Max from The Young Gentleman’s Guide, and I’ll see you next time!

What Can a Gentleman Like and Not Like?

Disclaimer: This post is extremely similar to an article that I’ll have going up on The Classy Libertarian next week. I just felt guilty for not having an article up last week, and I wanted something to write about for this week, so why not write about something that’s fresh in my mind? In any case, let’s get started.

Afternoon gents, it’s Max from the Young Gentleman’s Guide here! So today, I’m going to talk about part of what truly makes a man a man. Let me ask you this: what makes a man a man? If you were to ask a hundred different people, you’d likely get a hundred different answers. If you were to ask me, I would say that a true man is assertive, confident, a strong leader, and is able to stand up for himself. On top of that, a true man is someone who’s agreeable, helpful, trustworthy, and respectful to those who respect him. With this in mind, I’d like to bring up something that many will say is tied to masculinity, what a man can or can’t like or find enjoyment in.

Also,  before we get started, I just want to wish a very happy birthday to my dear friend The Vintage Athenian! She has been one of my biggest supporters for a long time, and I feel like this is the least I could so for her. So if you like, go ahead and hop over to her Instagram and wish her a happy, happy birthday, and tell her The Young Gentleman’s Guide sent you! Also, feel free to follow her if you want. 😀

For a while, I used to watch James Allsup, a conservative political commentator and anti-SJW personality on YouTube, and a few weeks ago, he put up a video called LEFTISTS DEMAND TO BAN ALL GUNS, in which Mr. Allsup presents his views on a cartoon musical about gun control. Now, I actually agree with most of what Mr. Allsup says in this video, but there is something he said in the beginning of the video that just rubbed me the wrong way. Mr. Allsup states outright that “musicals are geared towards women, children, and homosexuals” and that he’s “not in their target demographic.” Granted, while he never states that any of this is a bad thing, the way he said just seemed very condescending, as if he’s saying that if you like musicals, you aren’t actually a man. But after stewing over this for some time, it finally hit me. Why are people, especially men, not allowed to like something if they’re not in its target demographic?

Think about all the masculine traits I listed in the first paragraph. What do they have in common? They all have to do with how a man presents himself and how he acts around people, they have nothing to do with what a man finds enjoyment in. So if a man continues to display and practice the traits that at least I believe makes them a man, why should it matter what he likes or find enjoyment in? Now, keep in mind that the examples I’m about to bring up are mostly anecdotal and examples from my personal life, so take most of this with a grain of salt.

Some of the biggest male role models in my life have found and still find enjoyment in things like musical theater, Disney movies, and the like. While most of those things are usually targeted towards women and/or gay men, that does not mean that straight, masculine men, like most of the men I look up to, can’t enjoy them. My father is one of the strongest and most determined people I know. He’s in fantastic shape, is always on hand to help in any situation, and can do just about anything that requires the use of tools (as much as he hates plumbing). On top of that, he also loves going to Disneyland, and is always happy to attend a musical performance with his daughters. His brother, my uncle was one of the biggest fans of musical theater I’ve ever known. But just like my dad, he was also incredibly determined and strong, and he was one of the funniest guys I knew. He was also a master negotiator, and would do whatever he could to get his way in things like business deals; that’s what made him such a great salesman. Also, there was our other admin, Jonah. He’s also an Eagle Scout, but he’s also an avid actor and singer. He’s no doubt one of the greatest examples of a young gentleman I’ve ever seen, hence why I brought him on to be an admin, and he didn’t let what he loved doing get in his way of presenting himself as a true gentleman. And then there’s me.

While maybe not the perfect example, I still consider myself a traditionally masculine man. I’m an Eagle Scout, I’ve learned how to be assertive, how to be an effective leader, and how to stand up for myself. Now that I think about it, pretty much all I’ve learned about being a man can be attributed to my time in the Boy Scouts. They taught me how shoot a gun, how to save a person’s life in numerous situations, how to navigate the wilderness if I were to get lost, and countless other things that young men today should know. Now with all of this, let me ask you this: would you believe me if I told that I performed in ballet once? Contrary to what probably most of you would guess, I actually have. Not as a dancer, but I did play trumpet in a pit orchestra for a production of The Nutcracker, and that leads me to the meat of what I’m trying to say here. I do my best to practice those traits that I believe make me a man every day of my life, and yet I still find enjoyment in things like musical theater, ballet, opera, and animated Disney movies, all things that you can argue are mostly targeted towards women and children. That being said, I also enjoy movies like Indiana Jones and The Matrix, and video games like Halo, which are things mostly targeted towards men. But it shouldn’t matter what you like, no matter if it’s geared towards women, men, children, gay men, or anything else. What matters is how you present yourself and how you treat others. That’s what makes you a man. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to watch a performance of Waltz of the Flowers from The Nutcracker while writing some more articles for you gents!  I hope you enjoyed reading today’s post. Please be sure to share the post, follow the blog, and follow The Young Gentleman’s Guide on Facebook and Instagram. And on that note, this is Max from The Young Gentleman’s Guide, and I’ll see you next time!

The Art of the First Date

Morning gents, Max here! A new post on The Classy Libertarian by yours truly just went up this morning. Please be sure to read it, share it, do whatever you need to do. Keep an eye out for a new article here on Saturday!

The Classy Libertarian

It seems that in today’s society of modern feminism and social justice, the art of dating is dying. I suppose feminists and social justice warriors are not entirely to blame for this. We’re essentially in a golden age of dating sites and hookup apps right now, with Tinder, Grindr, and so on, there seems to be much more emphasis in casual hookups as opposed to actually developing a genuine connection or relationship with that certain lady you find attractive.

This can be extremely dangerous for both sides of the “relationship.” There’s the obvious danger of unwanted pregnancy and STD’s, but it can also damage your future relationships. Since people are not developing actual human connections outside of those of the physical nature, it can leave you incredibly unprepared for when someone you like does try to make a deeper connection. In order to fix the problems we have with…

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A Real Man Makes People Laugh

Evening gents, it’s Max from The Young Gentleman’s Guide here! So today, we have yet another article inspired by a video from Prager University. In this video, entitled Love Needs Laughs, the famous (or infamous, depending on how you look at it) Russian comedian Yakov Smirnoff talks about how the biggest sign of happiness in any relationship is shared laughter. It’s a wonderful and rather heartwarming video that I highly recommend you check out. And with Smirnoff’s words in mind, I thought I would give you a few reasons why being able to make people laugh is such an important trait for any gentleman to have. So without any further delay, let’s check out the list!

1. It Helps People Stay Positive

There’s a reason one of the highest-rated TV shows of all time is Matt Stone and Trey Parker’s South Park. While a lot of naysayers see it as just lowbrow, immature humor, the show, and more specifically Stone and Parker, have proven to be extremely clever and effective social satirists and commentators. And nowhere is that more apparent in the Season 5 episode “Osama bin Laden Has Farty Pants.” The reason I mention this episode is because it clearly displays the importance of laughter in general. Most of what I’m about to say is actually credited to the popular YouTube film reviewer Nostalgia Critic, so I am not about to take credit for any of it. That being said, in the wake of 9/11 and the anthrax epidemic being sent through the mail in late 2001, the United States was in a state of abject fear. As a response to this, Matt Stone and Trey Parker released this South Park episode, making Osama bin Laden look like a completely pathetic tool. After this episode was released, the US’s spirits were collectively raised, as temporary as it may have been. The reason being that everyone just needed a good laugh at the entire situation. And that’s the power of laughter. It could be the most awful, distressful situation ever, like in the case of 9/11, being worried about the threat of terrorism. But if you’re able to find humor in that situation, and thus react to it, it can simply help lift people’s spirits and reduce the pain of the situation even just a little bit. And with so many dark things happening in our world today, being able to make people laugh seems more important now than ever. Also, in the case of 9/11, I think the Nostalgia Critic put it best: “Giuliani showed us we needed to be strong, Letterman showed us we needed to cry, South Park showed us we needed to laugh.”

2. It’s a great way to bond with people

People always say laughter is the best medicine, and there’s a lot of truth to that. Not only has laughter been proven to lower blood pressure and decrease stress hormones, but it can also just help people bond with each other. This can be especially helpful in a romantic situation. I’ve always said that one thing I always look for in a woman is someone who can laugh at me and make fun of me, but in a fun, loving way. I feel like that’s one of the most important things to do in any relationship, romantic or not. If you and your lady able to notice and, more importantly, laugh at each others’ flaws or missteps, it will only help both of you more clearly see what you both love about each other. Obviously, acknowledging what you love about each other will only strengthen your relationship, but it doesn’t just stop there. One point that Yakov Smirnoff makes in the PragerU video is that it’s not just laughter that strengthens a relationship, but shared laughter. If you and the people you care about can find laughter and enjoyment in similar things, that can strengthen your relationship with anybody, it could be a significant other, a friend, or a family member, because you find what you have in common. It would obviously be hard to bond with somebody you don’t have many things in common with, and of course, that can be the death of any relationship, especially a romantic one. And what we find funny and find enjoyment in is the clearest way of showing what we like and what we don’t like, and if someone we know also finds those things funny, that can be a sign of a great relationship. So if you’re spending time with someone and you aren’t laughing at or with each other, it may time to evaluate you’re relationship, especially if it’s romantic.

So there it is! I know this list wasn’t a very long one, but that’s really all I needed to get my point across. A man who can make people laugh can raise people’s spirits and foster many a strong friendship. To me, those are among the most important things a man should strive to accomplish in his life. Thank you all so much for reading today’s article! I know things with my schedule have been a little odd, but for those of you who read my updates article (link right here if you missed it), I should be back to a consistent schedule starting now. Also, be sure to keep an eye out for any content I have coming out on The Classy Libertarian In any case, I hope you enjoyed reading today’s article. Please be sure to share it, follow the blog, follow The Young Gentleman’s Guide on Facebook and Instagram, and support us on Patreon. And on that note, this is Max from The Young Gentleman’s Guide, and I’ll see you next time!

Resources

Prager University – Love Needs Laughs: https://youtu.be/4qfum5vc4Ew

StopDoingNothing:  stopdoingnothing.com/healthy-living/the-five-most-important-reasons-to-laugh/

Top 11 South Park Episodes – Nostalgia Critic: https://youtu.be/qyZacZPzOS8

Updates and stuff!

Evening gents, it’s Max from The Young Gentleman’s Guide here! First and foremost, my apologies for being MIA lately. For those of you who are unaware, I was recently brought on as a brand ambassador for a new online publication, The Classy Libertarian, and I actually just put up my first article on their site earlier this week, which you can check out right here. With that in mind, I just wanted to catch you guys up on what’s been happening with the blog, and what I have planned for the future. I am still on the lookout for another admin so I can continue with my current schedule of two posts a week on The Young Gentleman’s Guide, so if you’d be interested in that or know someone who would be interested, please be sure to let me know! In the meantime, I’ll have to go back to just one post a week, but going forward, I will also re-blog my articles from The Classy Libertarian as they come out so you can see what’s going on there. So with all that out of the way, if you’re looking for more stuff to read, you can have a look at my first post with The Classy Libertarian, or feel free to read this article by my dear friend, the Vintage Athenian, where she addresses some controversy surrounding the celebration of VJ Day at the end of World War II (also be on the lookout for a collaboration with her before too long). In any case, this is Max from The Young Gentleman’s Guide, and I’ll see you tomorrow!

A Couple Big Announcements!

Afternoon gents, it’s Max from the Young Gentleman’s Guide here! So today, we won’t have any of our regular content, because we have some big announcements that might affect what’s going to happen on the blog going forward. So let’s not beat around the bush and get to the announcements!

The first announcement is going to be kind of hard to share, but unfortunately, our other admin, Jonah, will no longer be writing for the blog. Also, with Jonah leaving, the mini-series that he wrote, “Lessons in Manliness from the Vikings” will also be leaving. And this isn’t for any dramatic reason or anything, he just has a lot going on with school and work, among other things. I truly appreciate Jonah’s input, and everything he’s done for the blog. I will still continue to consult with him occasionally for future posts, and his posts will obviously still remain up on the blog so you can still see what he had to say. So on that note, thank you so much for you help, Jonah, and I wish you the best of luck in all your endeavors!

The second announcement may actually affect often things may be coming out on the blog. I was recently offered a position to write for another blog known as The Classy Libertarian, who put out content very similar to mine. They also put out more political commentary as well as cultural stuff and general gentlemanly things, so if all goes according to plan, I will be posting more to their cultural tab. Now, don’t worry, this this blog will still have content coming out on it, because I still have some exciting projects coming down the pipeline. If anything, I might have to cut back to one post a week, unless I can find another admin. I’ll let you all know the details of what’s coming as soon as they come. Thank you all so much for reading and continuing to support the blog, and I hope to see you over at The Classy Libertarian! Also, be sure to follow the blog, follow The Young Gentleman’s Guide on Facebook and Instagram, and support us on Patreon. And on that note, this is Max from The Young Gentleman’s Guide, and I’ll see you next time!